My brain/heart/gut are all confused, sometimes I wish I could just tear them all out and get rid of them(Bon fire anyone.?.). Too many thoughts, not enough hours in the day to deal with it all.. Most the time lately I feel like its all a waste of time to deal with it all. I just want to be done with everything and start fresh. Literally. I want to throw everything that I have accumulated over the past 20+ years and throw it all in a bag, and be done.I want to move to a place where no one knows me, and I can be whoever I want.
Lately I have to feel like I have to watch what I say, or do, or w/e. Just because I don't know who I'm bound to piss off. Its just complete bull shit. I'm so done trying to pretend. Trying to hide tears and depression and sadness all behind a smile. People ask me if I'm ok or if somethings changed. All I have to say is live a day in my body with my thoughts and then you may be able to understand.
Trying to get through everything has just made me sick. Nausea, headaches, dizziness=not a happy Katie =[. Then on top of that the stupid emotions lately. Little things are making me want to break into tears. Its so stupid and ridiculous lately!!
Thats all for now
<3 K
I hear you. I think about a fresh start all the time now.
ReplyDelete